It’s All Downhill After Age 45 According to an AARP Sex Survey

over 45

Sexual activity for this age group is less frequent.

Americans 45 and older are far more open to sex outside of marriage than they were 10 years ago, but they’re engaging in sex less often and with less satisfaction, according to a major new survey by AARP.


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Is There a Health Advantage to Being Married?


In 1858, a British epidemiologist named William Farr set out to study what he called the “conjugal condition” of the people of France. He divided the adult population into three distinct categories: the “married,” consisting of husbands and wives; the “celibate,” defined as the bachelors and spinsters who had never married; and finally the “widowed,” those who had experienced the death of a spouse. Using birth, death and marriage records, Farr analyzed the relative mortality rates of the three groups at various ages. The work, a groundbreaking study that helped establish the field of medical statistics, showed that the unmarried died from disease “in undue proportion” to their married counterparts. And the widowed, Farr found, fared worst of all.


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Language Structure Is Partly Determined by Social Structure


Geographic distribution of the 2,236 languages included in the present study

Psychologists at the University of Pennsylvania and the University of Memphis have released a new study on linguistic evolution that challenges the prominent hypothesis for why languages differ throughout the world.

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Everybody Laughs, Everybody Cries: Researchers Identify Universal Emotions


Laughter is a universal language, according to new research

Here’s a piece of research that might leave you tickled: laughter is a universal language, according to new research. The study, conducted with people from Britain and Namibia, suggests that basic emotions such as amusement, anger, fear and sadness are shared by all humans.

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Genetic Variation Linked to Individual Empathy, Stress Levels


A genetic variation may contribute to how empathetic a human is, and how that person reacts to stress.

Researchers have discovered a genetic variation that may contribute to how empathetic a human is, and how that person reacts to stress. In the first study of its kind, a variation in the hormone/neurotransmitter oxytocin’s receptor was linked to a person’s ability to infer the mental state of others.

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Holding Hands Reduces Pain and Discomfort


Holding the hand of a loved one during times of distress really can reduce their discomfort, scientists believe.  Researchers revealed that, at least for women, the touch or look of a boyfriend seems to anaesthetise them from pain. Even a photograph of their partner is enough to have an effect.


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Creative New Places to Have Sex

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The secret to your sex life may lie in some exotic new location

If your bedroom boredom has taken a toll on your sex life, all you need is a drastic, yet quick change. How about changing the place in which you are having sex?
Forget the boring kitchen or the bathtubs… think bizarre, out-of-the-box! Try out unexplored corners in your house, which you’ve have never earlier considered as apt places to enjoy a steamy sex session. From your storeroom to the dirty basement that you’ve never bothered to clean up to the garage that you thought was only meant for car parking – try out off-beat sex destinations and convert them into sensuous love dens.
Sex expert Dr. Deepak Arora agrees, “Whenever you experience a change in your life you feel more excited and the same holds true for sexual intimacy. Couples should keep changing the decoration of their rooms like lighting, placement of objects, wall colours, curtains etc to infuse a fresh feel every time they get intimate, as it boosts their sexual pleasure.”
Sex counselor Dr. Shivi Jaggi supports, “Taking of sex variations, a place can influence a couples’ pleasure quotient. Any place outside the stereotypical bedroom will help couples keep alive their sexual fire. The reason why they find hotel rooms more appealing than their bedrooms is for because it’s a new pleasure playground that takes their mind away from mundane domesticity and adds a zing of excitement. So, if they pay a little attention and experiment with the decor of certain places within their own homes, they can perform wonders in their sex life.”
So, the next time you plan an intimate session with your partner, try out these unexplored places within your house and see the heat of passion building like never before…
Garage Passion : Everyone loves a wild backseat romp, but it can get even wilder if you try sex in the garage. The dark ambiance and the rusty feel will surely build up the mood for a night of passion. Fun would be at its peak when you play love games of hide and seek behind the parked cars and let your partner look for you and thus build up your sexual mood. Alternately try a sex romp on top of your car. Dr. Jaggi explains, “In a garage, it’s the raw energy of the destination that adds to the pleasure and once you’re away from the comfort of your bedroom, this crude place is definitely racy and exciting. If you really wish to have a new-fangled change, you can specially design your garage to make it an apt place for sex.”
Word of caution : Make sure you do not make too much noise by pressing the car horn and disturbing your neighbours as they may interrupt your sexual act.
Arty Attic : An attic fills the space between the ceiling of the top floor of a building and the slanted roof, and they are known for being awkwardly shaped spaces with exposed rafters and difficult-to-access corners. So why not make the most of this neglected area in your house? Decorate it in an alluring manner to seduce your partner and during the act, try out new positions in accordance with the structure of the attic. Dr. Arora states, “Due to hectic lifestyles, couples have no time to maintain their attic space. But just devoting a single day to covert it into a lavish area to have sex can turn the heat on. Couples will surely leave their bedroom luxuries behind and have sex on rough surfaces like that of an attic.”
Word of caution : Since attics bear a slanted roof, ensure that you don’t get up much during the sexual act or else you’ll end up hurting yourself and spoiling the fun. .
Basement Pleasure : While some convert their basements into an office area, others keep it vacant as a partying hall. But think of decking it up in a way to arouse your trigger zones. Try having a set-up that looks completely breath-taking with a spa setting or a club like scene with a pole dancing space. Such creations enable a prolonged foreplay, thus building the mood right for hot sex. Dr. Jaggi adds, “If resources allow, you can get a boring basement area revamped totally and make it an exciting place to enjoy sex with your partner. Right from assortments of scented candles, aroma oils, and sexual paintings to dim lights etc, liven-up this area with everything that act as perfect aphrodisiacs”.
Word of caution : Don’t be too loud with your moaning sounds, as the echoes in an empty basement can wake up the other members in your house.
Cosy Corridor : If you thought the corridor was just meant for kids to play during the day and the elderly to relax in the evening, think again! You can make the most of this zone during your moments of pleasure. Think of a converting your otherwise tedious corridor/balcony into a sex inspiring den. Place a cot adorned with satin sheets and scented flowers can act as an add-on. Dr. Arora suggests, “If you’re staying on the top floor of a high rise, then the balcony or corridor can be a perfect place to have sex. Remember, you’ve moved to the balcony because you want to enjoy the fresh air and have sex in an open area, so no curtains are required. Also, ensure there are no surrounding buildings at the same level as your balcony and if there are, then wait for mid-night, so you can enjoy the act in the dark.”
Word of caution : Ensure that your kids are carefully locked inside their bedroom on that night and do not get to witness your act in open. Beware of peeping tom neighbours.
Storeroom Surprises : Imagine how a broken table lying wasted in the storeroom can make for a wonderful base to get intimate with your lover. While in the storeroom, you can try being a little more creative by taking out antique items, sexual pictures, Kamasutra paintings etc and creating an atmosphere to arouse your partner. Dr. Jaggi shares, “Having sex in the storeroom is a welcome change. Having limited space, it usually stimulates sex in standing positions. The little spaces meant for ventilation allow some amount of light to enter the room, so it would be an excellent shift, as far as the surrounding is concerned.”
Word of caution : Clear the excess dust in the storeroom as it may cause discomfort for either of the partners.
Romantic Roof-top : Having sex in the open on your terrace can be awesome, provided you make optimum use of the space. It can be by arranging a candle-lit dinner for your beau or decorating the entire roof-top with flower strands reviving your first-night charm. Dr. Arora opines, “If the rooftop is too high from which noone can see you from the outside, it can be an experience to remember. To make it more arousing, you can have a roof-top garden, which will not only add to the sexual energy, but also let you enjoy the fragrance of the blossoms. The moonlight adds to the ambience.”
Word of caution : Your roof-top should be as private as your bedroom, so ensure there are not too many roof-tops adjacent to your terrace that may hinder your moments of passion.

If your bedroom boredom has taken a toll on your sex life, all you need is a drastic, yet quick change. How about changing the place in which you are having sex?

Continue reading… “Creative New Places to Have Sex”


Does Recharging Your Marriage Really Require a Tropical Island “Couples Retreat”?

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Couple relationships are both more complex and vital than ever

In Today’s Economy More People are Traveling via the Internet than by Cars and Planes. Fortunately the Internet is Opening New Opportunities for Couples to Get a Picture of Their Relationship on the Web that Cuts Through Historic Therapy Approaches. ThriveSphere is the First in a New Generation of Online Couple Tools which Provides the Essential Benefits of a Retreat without the Trip.
Dr. Sherod Miller, CEO of ICP, Inc., an innovator in Couple Communication skills training of which more than 1.4 million people have participated, says “the movie Couples Retreat’s portrayal of marriage counseling is comical, but they portrayed a 20th century view of counseling. In the 21st century, the web is revolutionizing how couples and counselors connect.”
“Couple relationships are both more complex and vital than ever,” according to Daniel Lord, Ph.D., Professor of Marriage and Family Therapy. “But as the film shows, even though divorce is a real concern for many couples, most couples are very cautious about seeking professional help. This is where the web is shifting the whole scene of couple support and change, giving couples more information and more power to chart the course of their life together.”
The challenge for couples, until now, is that while the web has plenty of information about relationships, even sometimes too much raw information, there is very little interactive relationship-building help.
But that has now changed. In late 2006, Dr Miller was approached by Phil Lawson, CEO of Spherit Inc, with a patented web based tool and process that he believed could revolutionize marriage counseling. It was already being used for job readiness in workforce and colleges, and organizational strategic planning, to streamline communications and outcomes. Over the next two years Dr. Miller, Mr. Lawson and Dr. Lord developed an online marriage counseling application and have trained facilitators in the US and internationally from Australia to Russia in its use.
The online tool, an advanced computer visualization called ThriveSphere, allows couples to work with a trained facilitator and graphically see how they relate on one single page. The system incorporates neuroscience and the modern science of complex adaptive systems. It’s a strengths-based approach to couple change, putting the couple in the driver’s seat in strengthening their relationship and writing the next chapter in their couple life.
The system is now being used by the U.S. Army Family Life Chaplains to aid soldiers and their partners/spouses. When introduced to Chaplains for use in June of this year 87% responded that they think Army couples will get a lot of help from ThriveSphere, 83% thought the Army version of ThriveSphere will make their work with couples more effective and 77% indicated it will save them time.
Couples love it! “We do not understand why all therapists don’t use ThriveSphere. We had been to three therapists previously and had given up on therapy and our marriage. A friend told us about a therapist that used ThriveSphere with them. So we tried it and LOVED it. The connections the ThriveSphere made for us were indeed life changing.” (Comment of one couple whose names have been withheld for privacy.)
“As Vince Vaughn and the other actors showed in the movie, Couples Retreat, revitalizing a relationship requires a break in a couple’s routine and a new clarity of self for a different kind of encounter with one’s partner. This creates a new window for both to see and understand their relationship in fresh new ways. ThriveSphere takes what was formerly an anxious and time consuming effort, and created an engaging couple journey of discovery and change. Relationship help at the speed of the net.” says Dr. Lord.
Dr. Miller recommends that, “Before couples spend thousands of dollars in travel they should surf the web for resources now at their finger tips to open a new chapter in their relationship. ThriveSphere is the first in a new generation of support and resources to aid couples in healthy marriage education and counseling.”
Sherod Miller, Ph.D., is a social-psychologist and CEO of Interpersonal Communication Programs, Inc., in Evergreen Colorado. More than 70 independent research studies have been conducted on the Couple Communication program he co-developed at the University of Minnesota. He has trained 10,000 instructors in its use, written numerous books on communication and relationships, is a Fellow in the American Association for Marriage and Family Therapy, and a Certified Family Life Educator.
Dr. Daniel Lord is Professor of Marriage and Family Therapy (Friends University, Wichita, KS) Licensed Clinical Marriage and Family Therapist, pastoral counselor, and Couple Communication Training Associate. American Association for Marriage and Family Therapy (AAMFT) Clinical Member and Approved Supervisor. Diplomate in the American Association of Pastoral Counselors (AAPC). Ordained clergy in the United Methodist Church.
Phil Lawson, (aka Spherical Phil) is CEO of Spherit Inc, an inventor, author, creator of the Sphere Reflectment System. Spherit Inc facilitates personal, organizational and community transformation to prepare people for success in our 21st century world. The underlying concepts of the approach are explained in detail in the book: Being Spherical – Reshaping Our Lives and Our World for the 21st Century, which he co-authored and was published in 2004. Prior to entering the business world Phil and his wife spent 10 years in a ministerial work in the Southern United States in social change and integration activities.

In Today’s Economy More People are Traveling via the Internet than by Cars and Planes. Fortunately the Internet is Opening New Opportunities for Couples to Get a Picture of Their Relationship on the Web that Cuts Through Historic Therapy Approaches. ThriveSphere is the First in a New Generation of Online Couple Tools which Provides the Essential Benefits of a Retreat without the Trip.

Continue reading… “Does Recharging Your Marriage Really Require a Tropical Island “Couples Retreat”?”


Chimpanzees Help Each Other On Request But Not Voluntarily


Tool transfer upon recipient’s request.

The evolution of altruism has long puzzled researchers and has mainly been explained previously from ultimate perspectives—”I will help you now because I expect there to be some long-term benefit to me”. However, a new study by researchers at the Primate Research Institute (PRI) and the Wildlife Research Center (WRC) of Kyoto University shows that chimpanzees altruistically help conspecifics, even in the absence of direct personal gain or immediate reciprocation, although the chimpanzees were much more likely to help each other upon request than voluntarily.

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Rhesus Macaque Monkey Moms ‘Go Gaga’ For Baby, Too


Baby rhesus macaque.

The intense exchanges that human mothers share with their newborn infants may have some pretty deep roots, suggests a study of rhesus macaques reported online on October 8th in Current Biology, a Cell Press publication. Continue reading… “Rhesus Macaque Monkey Moms ‘Go Gaga’ For Baby, Too”


Monkeys’ Grooming Habits Provide New Clues To How We Socialize


Grooming monkeys. A study of female monkeys’ grooming habits provides new clues about the way we humans socialize.

A study of female monkeys’ grooming habits provides new clues about the way we humans socialise. New research, published September 30 in Proceedings of the Royal Society, reveals there is a link between the size of the brain, in particular the neocortex which is responsible for higher-level thinking, and the size and number of grooming clusters that monkeys belong to.

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