With lips like cherries and a tongue like strawberries,
she has all the makings of a total fruit cake
“If the crime rate keeps falling, we simply won’t be able to build prisons fast enough.” – – Futurist Thomas Frey
.
His decision to wear scuba gear rather than a parachute was one he would soon regret
.
.
.
Hmmm… there are so few sports that involve cows. Maybe for good reason
.
.
.
“Checkmate! Now bend over and let me sniff your butt”
.
.
.
Many wealthy people are little more than the conductors of their own possessions
.
.
.
If life treats you like a silhouette, at least make all the other silhouettes take notice
.
.
.
A true adventure always comes from bad planning
.
.
.
Word of advice. Never try to sing while eating watermelon
.
.
.
Everybody pities the weak. Jealousy you have to earn.
.
.
.
Let me show you the meaning of haste
.
.
.
Boy, those French people sure know how to raise a kid
.
.
.
Nature’s greatest masterpiece is the elephant. Now if only we can change their political standing
.
.
.
Monocle
.
.
.
Colorless green ideas sleep furiously
.
.
.
Up periscope!
.
.
.
Life is all about the journey, but sometimes it nice to know what’s in the pipeline
.
.
.
Run for your life!!!!!!!!
.
.
.
Deep down, we’re all convinced there is a sport that we can excel at
.
.
.
Question. Is it rude to invite a pig to a pig roast?
.
.
.
I have always preferred the reflection of life to life itself
.
.
.
A children’s story waiting to happen
.
.
.
Every closed eye is not sleeping, and every open eye is not seeing. But watery eye are the pathway to the soul
.
.
.
One tired bear
.
.
.
To her, life was a never-ending stream of irrational obsessions
.
.
.
All he wanted was to make an impact. The windshield decided to make his dream come true
.
.
.
A train without a track is like hope without a wallet
.
.
.
All things truly wicked start with an innocent lab experiment involving leftover genetic material
.
.
.
The hierarchy of the mustache
.
.
.
Hey, what’s up here?
.
.
.
Every day you move to a new page in your life, so pick a colorful one
.
.
.
Jealousy is an emotion that often happens when we least expect it