As with most politicians, breathing fire creates a good sideshow
“Before you criticize someone, you should walk a mile in their shoes. That way when you criticize them, you are a mile away from them and you have their shoes.” – – Jack Handey
.
Rule of Thumb: When traveling long distances, it’s best to bring your entire food chain with you
.
.
.
Curiosity! It’s a guy thing…
.
.
.
Some of life’s most important moments happen when you’re distracted with porn
.
.
.
The size of the hand is less important than the size of the food its trying to feed you
.
.
.
Some dogs were born to dance
.
.
.
Oh honey, quick! Get the camera!
.
.
.
I think I’ll sleep here
.
.
.
As with most giraffes, they never really know what their role in life is
.
.
.
If you can unravel a lime with your tongue, the rest of the world is a piece of cake
.
.
.
The power of sunshine
.
.
.
What a coincidence! Just yesterday I was wondering how to pose like that
.
.
.
Staffers at the White House begin every day by putting on a “positive outlook” mask
.
.
.
The real reason why pandas are going extinct. Darwin is watching!
.
.
.
After it was over, no one really wanted to help the guy inside
.
.
.
Curiosity! It’s a girl thing too…
.
.
.
The scent of sadness was in the air. Yes, extreme sadness!
.
.
.
Its so rare when I actually feel sorry for fire hydrants
.
.
.
Life is full of bad choices. This happens to be a big one
.
.
.
A total metal head
.
.
.
The key to life can be found in bananas. Now, if we can only find the key to unlock the bananas
.
.
.
In a brilliant stroke of marketing genius,
Tonka is making a play to replace the stork in baby lore
.
.
.
Apples. Its so rare when they come with a girl attached
.
.
.
Gangsta chicks
.
.
.
…and then this happened
.
.
.
If you’re wondering about the best parts of Oregon, all you have to do is look up
.
.
.
Oh look! My friend Josh is going to be at SXSW
.
.
.