The replicants knew when feeding time was upon them.
Thursday lunches were always insurance salesmen. Fridays were always leftover bankers.
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Quote of the Day: “I was born in very sorry circumstances. Both of my parents were very sorry.” – – Norman Wisdom
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Unbeknownst to David Letterman, the Cleveland Philharmonic spent over 400 hours
practicing to land a 4 minute spot on his show
Quote of the Day: “The only thing money gives you is the freedom of not worrying about money.” – – Johnny Carson
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When life begin to look like the Matrix, it’s time to pause and drink the wine.
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Quote of the Day: “The wages of sin are death, but by the time taxes are taken out, it’s just sort of a tired feeling.” – – Paula Poundstone
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Two young sweat shop workers on a smoke break,
huddled under an umbrella to talk rainbows and politics.
Quote of the Day: “I have tried to know absolutely nothing about a great many things, and I have succeeded fairly well.” – – Robert Benchley
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Anticipation of blood-shed. How is there not a word in our language for that?.
Quote of the Day: “What a nice night for an evening.” – Steven Wright
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It was all fun and games until he had to start eating giant regurgitated worms.
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Quote of the Day: “I’m a heroine addict. I need to have sex with women who have saved someone’s life. Hmmm, I’m gonna fix that last joke by taking out all the words and adding new ones.” – – Mitch Hedberg
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Mass suicide in the phone industry. If only they had a way to call for help!
Quote of the Day: “A recent police study found that you’re much more likely to get shot by a fat cop if you run.” – Dennis Miller
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The carrot-top leek-a-phone, for that truly organic sound...
.Quote of the day: “A severed foot is the ultimate stocking stuffer.” – Mitch Hedberg
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Human pixels, because traditional media is not social
Quote of the Day: “I am not afraid of death, I just don’t want to be there when it happens.” – Woody Allen
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If only we were able to unleash the true buying power of women, the whole economy
could be saved! But sadly, they’ve all been taking Dave Ramsey courses instead.
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Quote of the Day: “I was so ugly my mother used to feed me with a sling shot.” – – Rodney Dangerfield
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Good things come to those who stretch
Quote of the Day – “If there are no stupid questions, then what kind of questions do stupid people ask? Do they get smart just in time to ask questions?” – – Scott Adams
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Being crazy is never enough
Quote of the Day: “So the writer who breeds more words than he needs, is making a chore for the reader who reads.” – – Dr. Seuss
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